from the age of two

i've been wanting to write down all the funny things steele has been saying lately but it is so hard for me to remember them all. i usually text brett and tell him when it's really funny. steele is one of the sweetest little boys and his innocence is something i try to cherish. he talks in full sentences and says things that blow my mind all the time. he picks up on the littlest things and leaves me thinking "where did you get that?"

there are a few things steele is crazy about..... but most of all he loves my hair. well anyones hair for that matter. he will ask me to "play" with my hair. even when i'm in the passenger seat of the car he will say "lay down mommy, play with hair". he even will say "mommy's hair up. no play mommy's hair". i won't let him play when it's up because he'll pull it completely out. he knows now that it's off limits when it's up. it's a habit we're going to have to break because he's becoming obsessive.

a daily conversation i have with steele is what will happen when sister comes out of mommy's belly. we talk about going to the hospital and the doctor will take her out. the first time i told him this he said "and steele get sucker?!" because at each of my appointments he gets a sucker from one of the nurses. i told him that yes he would get a sucker when sister is born.

we talk about how he'll get to hold her and kiss her. i want to get him saying this on camera because it is one of the cutest things ever. he rocks his arms like he's holding a baby and says "i hold her and kiss her". we also talk about how it will be sister's birthday and we will have a party for her. i don't know if the hospital will allow candles but i want to have cupcakes with candles when she is born. steele loves birthday parties and loves to blow out candles! i want to make it fun and exciting for him and make sure he feels involved.

names have been a SERIOUS struggle this pregnancy (we are making progress but she won't have a name until she is born). i am always asking steele what we should name sister and have him say the few names we like. one day we were in the tub and i asked him what sister's name should be. he replied "name sister funny!" and ever since he will say that her name should be "funny". no worries, that name hasn't made our list.

another really hilarious story about steele; a few weeks ago we were sitting on the couch watching sister move in my belly and talking about how she has eyes, arms, toes ect. just like steele does. he then asked "sister have a wiener?" i about died laughing inside but simply said "no girls don't have wieners....and sister is a girl. only boys do." i really couldn't stop smiling.

i just love getting a sneak peak into his mind every day. i can tell he will be such a loving big brother to his sister. once steele even brought his beloved blanky over to my belly and laid it over the top and said "there you go sister". i'm so excited for them to meet. birth day will be a very special day for our family. as it gets down to these last few weeks i feel a lot of gratitude for the opportunity to experience pregnancy again. it is such a miracle seeing a little 8 cell embryo transform into a little person. i can't believe we will have two children when we were once told we may never have any. what a blessing!

{update: my fluid levels went up at my ultrasound yesterday! i have another appointment on tuesday and then we will discuss scheduling a date for the lil miss to be flipped. we're praying my fluids will stay where they are so they can at least give it a shot.}

how different can two pregnancies be?

i haven't posted a ton about all the details of this pregnancy. this post may not be very intriguing to many of you especially since there aren't a ton of pics for me to share. maybe i'll throw a few in there just because i like to look at pictures on blogs.

i'm not sure if the main difference in my pregnancies is having a boy vs a girl but if it is i prefer carrying a male.... most of all i'm grateful i'm healthy and so is the baby but i have had my far share of unfortunate issues.

first, back two months ago i kept having shortness of breath and tightness in my chest. long story short i ended up in the er for 6 hours being monitored and having a chest x-ray to make sure i didn't have any blood clots in my lungs. they were concerned about me having a pulmonary embolism. everything turned out be just fine, which was a huge relief.

next, i started to feel like i wasn't growing at the same rate i did with steele. i had taken pictures all throughout my pregnancy with steele so i knew how big i was with him. i even took this picture at 31 weeks which validated my concerns because at 31 weeks this pregnancy i measured 38 inches around.

 i told my dr my concern so he sent me to have an ultrasound to make sure she was growing properly. this is when i'm told that my fluid levels are low. she is measuring fine which is a good thing but the dangers of low fluid levels are concerning. they tell me i need to drink drink drink and i continue to have ultrasounds every other week to check fluids. they started to look a bit better after a month.

yesterday i went in for one of these ultrasounds. the news wasn't good. my levels had gotten lower and i was sent over to labor and delivery for a non-stress test.
good news is that she is doing great.
bad news, she is breach. 
i knew that she was breach because of all the ultrasounds and her head is literally a huge lump bulging from the top of my stomach at all times. i wasn't too concerned. normally this wouldn't be a big deal since i have about 5 weeks left for her to turn. the problem with the low fluid levels is that she doesn't have as much space to flip. another problem is she is already dropping. she is getting lower and lower which means she is getting nice and comfy right where she is. which is a BAD place for her to be. the nurse in labor and delivery {i love jill- she is one of the best ones over there} told me that they will send me over to the perinatologists at utah valley at about 37 weeks to have them flip her. the problem with my fluid level is that it is so low that they may not even try to flip her. because there is not enough space for the cord to move freely the chances of putting her into distress might be too great. the result if that happens....c-section.

can i just tell you that i am completely terrified of a c-section. i don't care how painful flipping her may be. i just DO NOT want a c-section. we live on the third floor our condo so i can't even imagine the recovery.... and not just all that but i love LOVE labor and delivery. it was one of the most rewarding, spiritual experiences of my life. i want more than anything to experience it again, especially because this may be my last time being able to go through it.

so now we pray. pray that she does some miraculous stunt and back-hand-springs her little head straight down where it should be. i'll keep you posted. i now will have an ultrasound weekly to check her fluids. i'm going to be soaking in my tub twice a day and drinking my little heart out. wish me luck.

as for some pictures that i promised.......
can we have the nice weather back.....PLEASE!

{tulip festival}

{first summer pool outing at grandma whites}

{belly at 32 weeks}

here's to her

{photo snapped by the talented yan at the bijou market}

this is my mother dear.

she and i have become really great friends over the years.

back in the day we didn't get along all that well but once

i outgrew my stubborn bratty teen years i discovered we

are a lot more a like than i would have ever thought.

these are a few thing that stick out in my mind when i think of my mom;

family first

clean orderly home

shopaholic (there is no question where i get this from) 

caring loving wife

unwavering in the gospel

positive 

home maker (canning, gardening, cooking...expert in all)

consistent

loving

hope someday i can accomplish all that my mom has in her life. 

i'm getting there and have learned so much from her already. 

{maternity photo shoot}

i figured today would be an appropriate day to post all my favorites!

my neighbor and friend nikki davis did my shoot last week. 

she did an amazing job as you can see by the pictures.

i would recommend her to anyone.

check out her blog here. 

a collection of spring photos

{hee haw farms}

the baby animals were seriously a.dorable

{easter}

 egg dying and egg hunting were very exciting for steele this year

{warm spring weather}

steele loves to sport his shades

{sneak peak of maternity shoot today}

more to come about being 32 weeks